Tuesday, December 14, 2004

The Nutjob Report, Part 2

Nutjob is busy making plans. She is now saying that if she gets to the party and sees that he has another girl there, she is going to make a big scene and will "claw her eyes out". Good. I hope she does, then they'll be forced to committ her.

She also says that if he takes her back, she's going to go off the Pill and get pregnant to trap him. I'm sure you're scratching your heads... yes, she is 50 years old and on the Pill. (She also takes herbal fertility supplements at the same time, but hey I never said she was brilliant). Now, I don't want to gross out any of my male readers, but I have to explain something. If you take the pill into your menopausal years, the hormones in the pill will prevent you from experiencing menopausal symptoms. So, she still gets to deal with that lovely blessing we younger women rejoice over every month. If she is no longer taking the Pill, she may go into menopause, which means no more monthly blessing, at least not on a regular schedule. So just imagine... she goes off the Pill... her period stops after a while because that's what bodies do when you're 50... and she takes this as a sign that she's pregnant. What's going to happen to her when she realizes what's really going on? Maybe I should invest in a bullet-proof vest. If anyone is a candidate for flipping their lid and shooting up the office, it's her.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh what I would give to be able to tell LoserBoyfriend all about her plans..... not that he doesn't deserve all sorts of misery simply for being a dick, but that particular trick is too low to pull on anyone -- even him.

ChinaGirl

9:53 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Using the "threat" of a baby is perhaps one of the most cancerous things you can do.

May she pay for it in this life or the next.

Mr. Ring of Fire

1:10 PM  

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