Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Bruce shows his class (again)

Time to introduce a new cast member! *insert fanfare here* I shall call her "HotBroker". We have very few female brokers, and this one is in her 40's (I'm guessing) but doesn't look it. She dresses very "young", but not embarassingly so- she can pull it off. She has a body that won't quit, a cute face and an outgoing (but not annoying) personality. Obviously, she's well liked by the males in the office. (I feel a little bad for her though... she's not liked for who she is, she's liked for what she looks like. But that's a whole other topic for a whole other post).

Today I wandered into the kitchen to refill my cup of coffee and she happened to be in there with one of the gals from the other department. I caught the tail end of a conversation.

HotBroker: ...it really sucked to hear that, so here I am in here eating chocolate.

Gal: Yeah that is pretty harsh.

I was going to tactfully stay out of whatever I'd just walked into, but she's not shy. She turned to me to fill me in.

HotBroker: SilentWitness, you'll never believe what Bruce said to me.

Me (wryly): Try me.

HotBroker: He actually looked at me and said "You know, if only you were 20 years younger...." If only? Then what? And 20 years?! Ouch!

Me: What an asshat. Don't take it personally, he has no class whatsoever.

And I related the "Mexican hairless" comment regarding my latest haircut. Then Nutjob spoiled the Bruce-bashing, chocolate-eating bonding session by running in to tell us there was chocolate in here. Um, not anymore there's not.


Blogger Violet Meeks-Kane said...



11:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sounds like it's time for Bruce to get the "how to keep the company from getting sued for sexual harrassment" memo... what an ass.


11:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What an ass ... hot broker has. Yummy, YUM-MY! (Sorry, just wanted to play lout for a moment.)

Now a person who has a great ass and everything else is Kate Beckinsale. I saw her in that Underworld movie last night and she looks amazing for her age. She's at the very least 32 and my mouth dropped open from time to time. (Understand, I saw her in Much ado about Nothing when she was 20, and she looked very pretty, but in the last few movies she's been in - 10 years later, she's looked dead* sexy!)

The movie's actually pretty good. :)

Oh, and yes, Bruce gives a bad name to Bruces everywhere. Tact, buddy. Look it up.

Mr. Ring of Fire (who seems to be really quite taken with Kate Beckinsale)

* Ok, ok not "dead sexy", she was "undead sexy"

PS Two points to SW for using the phrase "a body that wouldn't quit". Its been too long since I've heard that phrase. (Not meant in terms of it being used for myself, but in terms of it just being used.)

PPS My body doesn't quit either. It just kind of gives way to exhaustion.

9:36 AM  
Blogger SilentWitness said...

"PS Two points to SW for using the phrase "a body that wouldn't quit"."

It's the result of me hanging out with guys all the time in college, and being surrounded by them here. Sometimes I talk like one. (Especially when I have a glass of wine. Then I talk like a truck driver... right Violet?).

10:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, I just think the phrase is a bit antiquated - and that's why I like it, dagnabit!

Though for a woman of beauty, I prefer "traffic stopping".

Though I stay away from the word "Gams".

Mr. Ring of Fire

2:21 PM  
Blogger SilentWitness said...

But see, really unattractive things can be traffic stopping too. Like mangled bodies. They have a tendency to back up traffic for miles. Sheesh.

2:51 PM  
Blogger Craig said...

good call, Mr,. Fire--Beckinsdale is indeed 32--July 26 1973. Oooh, I think that's the same birthday as my uncle . . . plus thirty years.

"A body that doesn't quit" is indeed a classic. Right up there with "Legs that go all the way to the top". But the greatest description of a woman must surely be:

"She's got HUGE . . . tracts of land!"

3:51 PM  

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