Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Swan song?

I know I’ve been lax in posting here lately, but this move is killing me. This might be the most screwed up move in the history of office moves- at least it will be until ChinaGirl’s office moves in April… then that will be the most screwed up. But ChinaGirl doesn’t have to follow behind and pick up the pieces the so-called “move project management” team hundreds of miles away is leaving behind (this might be because her company wouldn't bother with such a trivial detail. But I digress). I am ready to throw some people out the flipping window. So, good ol’ Silent hasn’t been in a very talkative mood lately. That combined with the fact that my co-workers have been mind-numbingly boring lately doesn’t yield very interesting posts, so I’ve been on the quiet side.

I’ve also been thinking that this might be the end of the blog. When we move, I will be sitting nowhere near the Three Musketeers, Nutjob, or Jane. I guess I’ll just have to see how it goes. This afternoon though, I think the Three Musketeers and I had our last hurrah. A few hours after a slight meltdown, I was feeling quite punchy. Apparently the Musketeers were, too. PartnerInCrime was wandering around, having completely lost all motivation after an hour and a half conference call consisting of complete pointlesness, and he pointed out that these were the last few days that I’d be near the Musketeers. There was lots of sarcasm back and forth between me and Musketeers #2 and #3, and then Musketeer #1 came back to his office after flirting with one of the admins. PartnerInCrime told him he better make the best of these last few days of us all being together after so many years (7 years in this place!!!). Musketeer #1 pretended to lament and go on about how boring it would be without me near them, then suddenly switched gears. My boss was in her office working on something, so she was well within earshot.

Musketeer #1: Hey, SW’s Boss! Can I have a hole in my wall going into Musketeer #2’s office?

PartnerInCrime: Huh huh huh… hole

Musketeer #1: C’mon, Boss. I want a hole in my wall!

I need to backtrack a bit and explain this “hole” thing. A few years ago, my boss and HeadHoncho decided it was too much work to get up and walk into each other’s office to talk (or, apparently, to pick up the phone), so they had a “window” cut in the wall between their offices, with sliding glass panes put in it. Everyone refers to it as the “hamburger window”, because it looks just like a drive-through window. HeadHoncho was so impressed with himself that he decided it would be a great idea to put similar windows in our new office space. There are three offices in a row: his, my boss’s and mine, and there are windows in each wall, so theoretically, HeadHoncho could yell through my boss’s office to me if he so desired. These windows have become a source of amusement to the entire office, and for some reason, in the new space they’re quite a bit larger than the one my boss and HeadHoncho have now. So… back to the “hole” conversation.

My Boss: It’s a little late for that now.

PartnerInCrime continues chortling Butthead-style and repeating the word “hole”.

Musketeer #1 (to me): You have a much bigger hole over there than you do here.

Me: Yes, it’s quite a bit bigger.

Musketeer #1: Are they going to put glass in it? That’s a big hole to leave gaping open like that.

Me: Yeah, there’s glass in there already.

Musketeer #1: Are there locks on it? Will you be able to lock your hole?

Me: No…

Musketeer #1: Well what’s the point then, if you lock your door, and your boss leaves hers open, someone could just go right through into your office. (pause, then slightly louder, for my boss’s benefit) I could crawl right through your boss’s hole to get to you!

PartnerInCrime practically had an aneurysm and I have to confess that at this point I was laughing pretty hard myself.

MyBoss: I heard that!

Musketeer #1 (also laughing now): Well what the hell, let’s keep going… Hey Boss, do you think I would fit through your hole?

MyBoss: I knew that was coming… No… I think you would get stuck.

Musketeer #1: I’d get stuck in your hole with just my feet sticking out!!!

I nearly choked on my coffee. I don’t know what happened to PartnerInCrime, he may have imploded. Jane had left early, which is the only reason we got away with any of this silliness. I don’t know, it doesn’t seem nearly as funny now as it did at the time, maybe I just needed a really good laugh. The movers start bringing crates in on Thursday, and we have to be all packed up by next Tuesday afternoon. There probably won’t be much time for posting, but I’m sure in the next week and a half something interesting is bound to happen. If I throw myself off the roof, I’ll give PartnerInCrime the password to this blog so he can post and let you all know when and where the funeral will be. (Hopefully I’ll remember to give it to him before I jump).


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think we should have a countdown or at least a recap of the top ten memories from the blog - the WHOLE blog. :)

So get on that.. right after you y'know, move your entire company just a step to the left.. then a jump to the right.

Mr. Ring of Fire

10:12 PM  

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